Icing
I am not in a good mood, should I be surprised? I made and appointment for a three our Pesco testing for financial aid. Things are looking up.I went on a country drive to find a longer bike route and it cost me $73.00 for a speeding ticket. I'm going to have to dance even more now just to make the money. I'm hating life right now. I started having a breakdown right in front of the officer. I didn't care. I then went on a bike ride, crying and puking, my nerves are shot. My face looks like a dot-to-dot on crack. I'm overwhelmed, life just keeps on getting harder.
If I were to get hit by a car on my bike I really wouldn't give a shit. I was imagining the Mack garbage truck hitting me as it drove by, wondering why no one would hit me. They all just kept driving around me. What would the train have done if I stood in the tracks? This is why I don't get a gun, they would be finding my dead body in the abandoned barn I saw as I rode my bike. Me and my gun in the abandoned barn. Nice thought to have, but yet I am still alive. Broke, not able to afford counseling and now I have a speeding ticket to pay. I will have to work another night shift. I hate dancing on the night shift.
Mace-I couldn't find it to take with me on my bike ride. I figured so what, if someone took me and body dumped me I would be dead anyways and wouldn't need it. What would I know.
What do I have left, I have nothing. My chest is sinking, tight.
Am I having all these bad thoughts just because of a speeding ticket? Icing-just more icing on my proverbial cake. There is always a setback. My God. What is wrong with me?
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